It’s been a little over 5 months since you’ve been here. Maybe it’s just because it’s Valentine’s Day, so I’m feeling sentimental, but today I’m really glad I’m your Momma.
I was rocking you to sleep for your morning nap, watching your eyes flutter open and closed as your little hand stroked my hair, as it often does when you’re beginning to drift off. I felt you snuggle in closer and realized that your feet now practically hang off the side of the glider as your head practically falls off my arm. You’re still so small, but when did you get so big? How is it I see you every day, yet I am still in awe of the tiny changes you go through?
Your bottom teeth popped through this week. Again, I thought, since when have you gotten so big? Where does time go? I know I’m going to think this so many times throughout your life.
It’s funny that you never really realize the way in which your own parents love you, until you have a child. All of a sudden, all of the things they claimed during an argument during your teenage years that they “sacrificed” or “did” for you start to make sense. I understand why my parents acted the way they did. You will be the biggest investment of my life. (Your daddy is a close second.) Parents make the investment willingly. It doesn’t take long for your value to increase exponentially. We have so much fun with you on a daily basis. Your smile melts my heart, and your tears break it.
I know you won’t always be easy. We had some rough weeks in the beginning. There were lots of times where I really wondered what in the world I had gotten myself into by becoming a parent. And I’m sure when you’re the toddler in the store who’s throwing an epic tantrum, I’m again going to wonder why I wanted kids as I haul you out to the car. But for now I’m going to enjoy these little moments of peace…the snuggles I get when you’re falling asleep; the smile I get when you wake back up and you see I’m coming to pick you up; the giggles you give Daddy when he tickles you in just the right spot.
This what I promise to you today: I will take joy in the many small moments of being your mom.
I know there are so many struggles ahead of us. But know that no matter what, I have loved being your mom.
(aka, the food lady)